Dirt and sunshine
Tuesday, November 9, 2021
I woke up this morning feeling annoyed that my life is not easier. Simpler. As in, why do humans need to eat so regularly that there is constantly food to be bought and prepared and then dishes to clean and put away, all just to be brought down and dirtied up just a few hours later?
Why do we have so much stuff? Stuff to be cleaned and organized and tidied and sorted? Even our trash needs to be separated.
Humans need too much stuff. Water bottles and binders and blankets and shoes and plates and bowls and backpacks. Lots of b things, it seems. I’m sick of all the stuff. Make it go away.
The other day I was thinking about how much waste just one person makes, and how all that waste has to go somewhere. I think I was cleaning my house, or something, and feeling good about how tidy and neat and clean I had made everything. I was throwing out lots of stuff, which I love to do. The act of chucking a bag of old socks and plastic cups and lumpy lunch boxes (that I’ve been holding onto for 6 years just in case I need them) into the big blue garbage can is deeply satisfying. I feel good about myself for a second. Until I think about the cumulative effort of everyone doing this all the time and realize that stuff doesn’t just disappear when it leaves my house. All the crap gets together and forms an even bigger pile of crap. Eventually it’s gotta catch up with us, right?
And this is just our things. What about our waste? The obvious ones, yes, but also just, have you ever thought about how after you take a shower there is hair and dirt and grime and microscopic cells that just washed down the drain and goes god knows where? I finally cleaned my bathroom the other day after about, oh, 4 months of not cleaning it, and I instinctively dry heaved/gagged a few times. Why are humans so gross? Where is all the hair coming from, and how do I still have any on my head?
I’m sick of it all. I’m sick of the carpet. I’m sick of the shoes. I’m sick of the cups. And the wires. The fucking wires. Why are there so many?
Let’s return to nature. Let’s dance nude under the moonlight and drink morning dew off the grass. We’ll acclimate our bodies to survive off of dirt and sunshine, we’ll eat honey straight from the source. We’ll join forces with the fox and the squirrel, the worm and the…mosquito? Bug spray. We can still have bug spray. And tarps, for when it rains. A pot might be nice too, so we can boil our water and not die from lurking parasitic creatures. I guess that means we’ll need matches, or flinty rocks, or something.
I guess I want my stuff. But I definitely don’t want to live my best life. I just want to live a mediocre, normal life where no one ever uses the word epic again and I don’t have to sweep so much or feel bad about my eyebrows or worry that democracy is slowing crumbling around us or that an unplanned* trip to the ER is going to financially ruin me. That’s all.
*Why do we say unplanned trip to the ER? No one plans a trip to the ER.
